The Lure of the Award Show
Tonight (well, last month as you read this) is the Golden Globe awards. They are Oscar-Lite, less pretentious, and a lot more fun—like a Bar Mitzvah, but where your uncle is played by George Clooney. Unlike the staid Oscar ceremony, the Globes involves food and, more importantly, alcohol. Stars drink too much and are more loose-lipped if they win. There’s something entertaining, too, about listening to a lifetime achievement award winner, hearing forks tapping against plates.
While a Globe award is of course worth winning, it’s the Oscar that is deemed the Holy Grail. I can’t miss the Oscar ceremony either, although they rarely fail to disappoint. Here’s how it usually goes for me:
A month before the show: “OOH, the Oscars are on next month!” Excitement level 8, on a scale of 1 to 10.
Two weeks before the show:
“I can’t wait for the Oscars! Billy Crystal is hosting again!!”
Excitement level 9.
A week before the show: “OMG, it’s next Sunday!!” Excitement level 9.5
The day of the show: “I have Oscar Fever! Do I want cashews or sunflower seeds as my Oscar-watching snack of choice?”
Excitement level 10.
Five minutes before the show starts: “Ooh, ooh, ooh!” Excitement level sky high.
The arrivals: “That’s the ugliest dress I’ve ever seen. Did she need another face lift? He is so handsome. They are still dating?” Excitement level 11.
Five minutes after the show starts: “Why are the clips so fast? I can’t see this fast. I am getting old. I’m tired. How long is this show?”
Excitement level 7.
An hour into the show: “Time to check my e-mail.” Excitement level 4.
Four hours into the show: “Would it be bad to miss the Best Picture winner?” Excitement level 0.5.
However, year after year, I do watch the Oscars, and the Golden Globes, and the Tony awards, too. Why?
I love the glamour, and I love entertainment.
I started watching movies in the womb. I’m in awe of the talent I see on stage in Manhattan. These award shows, as bad or boring as they may be, are the equivalent of our own Nyack High School Honor’s Night. I may not really care who wins “Most Improved Student,” but I want to be there to support the kids. And I wish I were there, at the Oscar ceremony, or Vanity Fair afterparty, chatting with Anjelica Huston, with whom I’m certain I could be great friends. And maybe Michael Caine will show up, and maybe I’ll leave my husband and he’ll leave his wife and we’ll run off together and live happily ever after? Who knows? This is show biz, where anything can happen!
Holly Caster has lived in Nyack with her playwright husband, two kids, and two cats for over 10 years. She is by trade a writer and by nature a fan of theater, movies, books, history, & art.